I know, but yes you are. I understand the difficulty, but if you can't then you poor boy will suffer greatly. I know home euthanasia is not allowed in this group's discussions, so I can not advise nor talk about it any further. Maybe a pm with SQ might help. But if I absolutely had no other choice, I would do what needed to be done. There are a couple ways that I, personally, could do that are humane, but it's still not easy. I'm sorryI'm just not strong enough, to do it myself.