hopper...8-6-08

Discussion in 'Memorials' started by shade, Aug 6, 2008.

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  1. Aug 6, 2008 #1

    shade

    shade

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    I'm at a loss for words right now... Yesterday I got home from work and noticed one of the boys was snuggling with Ben (dad) and thought "cute" but a closer look showed that he was breathing abnormally so I took him out and immediately knew something was wrong. He was practically limp in my hands. I rolled him onto his back to check markings and see who it was and he didn't even put up a struggle. He had a large amount of poryphrin coming out of his nose and his breathing sounded very congested. With every breath his nose made this click/peep sort of sound. His body felt cold, he was dehydrated, and underweight.

    I'm not sure how he got like that, I handle my babies and play with them every day and am not sure how I didn't notice this earlier because he looked like he hadn't eaten in a couple days. I made him some oatmeal and tried to hand feed him and he looked as though he wanted to eat but didn't have the strength to. he'd nibble a little here and there then move away and lay in my lap. I wrapped him up in some blankets to keep him warm and just sat with him, trying to get him to eat or drink something. After a while he fell asleep then woke up seeming worse than he was before. I called the emergency line for the University of Florida vet clinic because they see small animals like rats. The vet told me to try and get some fluids into him and to give him some sugar water because he was dehydrated. I did that with a small syringe and he put up a fight and refused to swallow it. But the vet had said just to get it on his gums so he'd absorb it.

    30 min later he seemed to be showing small signs of energy but not enough to say he was getting better. He kept grabbing the tag for his blanket so I tried to feed him again but he still wouldn't eat. I couldn't sleep with him so at about 12am I put him back in his cage planning to take him to my vet in the morning.

    but morning didn't come soon enough... Poor hopper was laying in the bottom corner of the cage by himself. He looked like he was trying to sleep when he died but just couldn't breath well enough to.

    I feel like the worst rat owner in the world because a 10 week old baby doesn't just die like that without reason. The only thing I can think of is that he wasn't dried well enough when we bathed them a week ago... and if that is what caused it...I just feel like it's my fault; that I killed my little kid. And I pray to god that this wont make people not want to adopt them now. I've checked the other babies and they're all healthy... I don't know why poor hopper died...
     
  2. Aug 6, 2008 #2

    jorats

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    I'm so sorry shade. :sad3:
     
  3. Aug 6, 2008 #3

    mamarat

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    I'm so sorry. :(
     
  4. Aug 6, 2008 #4

    Catibrie

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    I am so sorry.
     
  5. Aug 6, 2008 #5

    Melissa's ZOO

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    I am so sorry.
     
  6. Aug 6, 2008 #6

    Dahlas

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    I am very sorry
     
  7. Aug 6, 2008 #7

    jennifervb

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    I'm so sorry for your loss, Shade. :tearful:

    I can imagine how this affected you.

    It is normal to feel guilt when a beloved rat dies, Shade, but the reality is that you did absolutely nothing wrong.

    Rats may be resilient in many aspects but they are also prone to illness like any other living thing. In this case, little Hopper was resilient in that he was able to "hide" his symptoms from his doting mom. Trust me, I've been there and I know how well they can hide things.

    You were a wonderful mom to him Sweetie. Please do not beat yourself up! :cuddle: What mattered most, in this scenario, is that you did everything conceivable to help him and you followed the vet's instructions. You supported the little man in every possible way. :rose:

    The hardest thing for human beings to accept is that they are not God and cannot always prevent bad things from happening. What we tend to forget is everything we did do for our loved ones. It is almost like we erase everything positive from our memories because we were unable to save our loved one. It is a red line that extends through our characters more often than not.

    You have to be strong Shade and force yourself to internalize the wonderful, selfless and caring efforts you made to save your boy. No one could have done much more than you did and no one here expects more from you. We have all been there and we know how much it hurts. :rose:

    Your little man now wreaks fuzzy havoc at the Rainbow Bridge. He can do that because he was loved, here on Earth, by you. Never forget the efforts and sacrifices you make for your babies in times of need. Never blame yourself for trying and not succeeding. Those who neglect and don't care about their pets' well being are the ones who the guilty conscience should be reserved for... you do not belong to that crowd.

    Allow yourself the right to grieve your little man but always remember that you made every conceivable effort to help him. You have not scared anyone out of potential rat ownership. Rats are living entities and they will also have their health issues. What matters is that they had the support, love and care through their ordeals. That is what counts Shade... and that is exactly what little Hopper got from you.

    You will never want for your place in Heaven. You are one of the good ones. :love6:
     
  8. Aug 6, 2008 #8

    ohrats27

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    *hugs* you are a great rattie mom. so sorry for your loss
     
  9. Aug 7, 2008 #9

    SQ

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    I am very sorry ...
    :hugs:
     
  10. Aug 7, 2008 #10

    lj

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    :sad3: I'm so sorry.
     
  11. Aug 7, 2008 #11

    Cityratt

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    Im so sorry for your loss Shade, it's so hard when they leave us too soon
     
  12. Aug 7, 2008 #12

    Moon

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    I'm sorry Shade... sometimes they leave us without warning and any real cause that we can see.
     
  13. Aug 7, 2008 #13

    shade

    shade

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    :sad3: Thank you for those words, they really helped. Thank you everyone for what you have told me.

    Yesterday I buried him in the back by our bushes. The sun always shines bright there so he should like it. I'm kind of hoping the same thing happens to him that happened when my rat Zeus died. After we buried him, a tree just grew out of nowhere in his place. It grew tall and beautiful and always reminds me of him.
     
  14. Aug 7, 2008 #14

    Sharlees rattakisses

    Sharlees rattakisses

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    I am SO sorry!! :sad3: Know one knows why a baby would die so unexpectantly. My Unnie died about the same age just last month of kidney failure but looked normal until it was too late. I know how you feel and it's easy to blame yourself but there was NOTHING you could do. :( You loved him and he knew it. Don't beat yourself up over something you could not control. :cuddle:
     
  15. Aug 8, 2008 #15

    jennifervb

    jennifervb

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    Little Zeus flexed his muscles and a tree grew.... isn't that FABULOUS!!!!!!! :love6:

    Did you ever read the book "Where the Red Fern Grows"?
     
  16. Aug 8, 2008 #16

    Cityratt

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    I read that book in public school. Cried for a day. but it was a beautiful book :nod:
     
  17. Aug 9, 2008 #17

    Godmother

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    I'm so sorry about Hopper. It's terribly hard the way they go from OK to sick in no time at all. Take care.
     
  18. Aug 10, 2008 #18

    morats

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    I'm so sorry :sad3:
     
  19. Aug 10, 2008 #19

    jennifervb

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    I cried like there was no tomorrow but I always manage to re-read it! :love6:

    I cried most when the boy found the fern between the two, little, graves. What a glorious honor for the dogs!!!

    It was a riveting book!!!! :bow:
     
  20. Aug 12, 2008 #20

    shade

    shade

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    No unfortunately I didn't but I do want to.
     

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