Smeag's ruptured eye - she's dead

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i've got her with me now. she's taking a while to wake up but at this point its either she will make it or she won't so i have her with me. they have given her 2 reversals since the operation late this morning and she is starting to respond to me. pressing her head into her chin rubs and moving her head away from my eye taps, though she still has not really moved much beyond that. we're in a tricky place right now but the vet says she should be coming around, though slowly, soon. so we're not out of the woods yet, but we're getting there with any luck.
 
its 7am, she was alive just at 5 when she was moving her upper body and she was taking water from a syringe. but then i fell asleep. i've been awake with her all night long and then i fall asleep for two hours and now she's dead. i should have left her in pain with the eye, i should have just left well enough alone and let her resolve it on its own. she would have been hurting but at least she would still be alive. we had her hydrated again, or at least mostly so. she was finally showing signs that she was pulling through and then i had fall asleep. i was awake through all the rest and then i had to go and fall asleep.it probably let her fall asleep too and now she's gone. i should have just left well enough alone.
 
I'm so sorry Twitch! Sending you hugs. :cuddle: You really didn't do anything wrong.

If it makes you feel less guilty I unintentionally brought about the death of one of my rats (Banko) when I gave him a med (by injection) that he was allergic to. One hour later my boy died. I'm still feeling bad about it, but also know that I was genuinely trying to help him.
 
I am sorry Twitch....we all wish we had done things differently at times. You did what you thought was best....same as any of us would have done. It might have worked out wonderful. I am very sorry it didn't but don't blame yourself......you didn't do anything wrong....
 
Oh Twitch... don't look at it that way. You did your best and she knows it. She waited for you to sleep to slip away, she tried hard to stay with you but it was time. Even leaving it alone, you don't know how long she would have lived and in pain...
I would have done the very same thing as you. I'm so sorry Twitch... :cry3:
 
Don't feel guilty - what if you had left it and she was in pain for a week or however long and then passed away anyway? That would have been worse.

Hindsight is always twenty/twenty - you really did the best for her that anyone could have done. It's not your fault that her little body for whatever reason failed at that time.

It does always seem to happen when you finally go to sleep. It's happened to me, and while I know you do feel guilty as I've done, you really shouldn't put yourself through that.
 
Twitch I am so, so sorry. You did your very best, nothing you did was wrong or caused her death it was just her time to go. Even if you did not do the surgery and she passed you would wonder if you should have done the surgery and would she have lived. It is not always a clear choice and you are most times left with the wonder of "what if?" Just remember you tried your best and in the end she is pain free and knew how much you loved her. RIP Smeag.
 
You did your best. I have to echo what the other's said - these things do happen and you can bet your last dollar she knew you were trying to help her. That's why she tried so hard to come around and then waited until she knew you were asleep. *hug*
 
Aw Twitch, I'm so sorry.. You've been saying all this time she was in pain no matter what you were doing for her, so what else could you have done? You tried to give her her life back, it just wasn't in your ability to do so. But you did take her suffering away, obviously that's all that was within your control. I'm so sorry your baby couldn't have got all better.
 

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