Empty Cage Syndrome?

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TheHermit

TheHermit

Senior Member
Joined
Nov 26, 2011
Messages
461
Location
Barrie, ON
It is much harder to lose a baby without other babies at home. For almost five years I've been able to find solace in cuddling another rat and continuing to care for cagemates left behind.

Waking up to an empty cage was a lot more painful than I had anticipated.

The worst part is the subconscious instincts. I literally cannot do anything without thoughts flying into my head like a bullet train along the lines of "I should get the boys out."

Making any food and "I should make extra for..."

Watching tv or playing games and "I should bring ____ to the couch..."

Even vaccuuming!! "I should close the door so it doesn't bother..."

Literally every single instinct I've gained since having rats is still on at full power. I even had to stop and take a deep breath when I turned around while doing laundry and the cage door was open and I had that moment of panic like "OMG WHERE ARE THEY?!"

I'm not ready to take down my CN yet. Maybe in a few days.

Has anyone ever gone through a grieving period with an empty cage? How long does this last for?
 
TheHermit said:
It is much harder to lose a baby without other babies at home. For almost five years I've been able to find solace in cuddling another rat and continuing to care for cagemates left behind.

Waking up to an empty cage was a lot more painful than I had anticipated.

The worst part is the subconscious instincts. I literally cannot do anything without thoughts flying into my head like a bullet train along the lines of "I should get the boys out."

Making any food and "I should make extra for..."

Watching tv or playing games and "I should bring ____ to the couch..."

Even vaccuuming!! "I should close the door so it doesn't bother..."

Literally every single instinct I've gained since having rats is still on at full power. I even had to stop and take a deep breath when I turned around while doing laundry and the cage door was open and I had that moment of panic like "OMG WHERE ARE THEY?!"

I'm not ready to take down my CN yet. Maybe in a few days.

Has anyone ever gone through a grieving period with an empty cage? How long does this last for?
Click to expand...

I took a break once...lasted 2 months a long long time ago but I remember it vividly.

Now is when you try to do the things you were unable to do with your ratters around...not sure what it would be for you, but I am sure you can think of something :D
 
Awww, I know that pain. It's bloody horrible :( I took a break for an entire year last year. Empty cage syndrome is intense at first. It doesn't completely go to be honest, mine didn't. If you've had rats a while, there are things that are just ingrained into you! And because we love them so much and want to give them the best care. I'm always thinking about the rats. Even when they were gone. Even a year later, little things seeing an abandoned newspaper on the train so I could take it home for the rats to rip up was still an automatic thought for me. And it was quickly followed by that empty thought that there were no furries waiting for me at home. And I hadn't had any rats for a year.

I had to take a break though, it was essential as I'd lost so many rats all in one go and I had to heal. Just over a month ago, I adopted 4 baby boys! And they have brought me back to life.

It's going to be natural for you to feel those instincts for a while. It sucks though! But the intensity will fade.
 
I find it strange even for a day or so, if I've returned from a long vacation and the rats are being cared for elsewhere. I like to say good morning and goodnight to them and call goodbye and hello when leaving/entering the house.

I also feel lost after a sick one has died, especially when there were frequent medications and special food.

So I can well imagine that it's a terrible adjustment being without rats. Shelagh's advice is good, though.

I don't know whether it helps to know that, when you feel ready to have rats again, there will be some little ratties grateful for you for giving them a home.
 
I have not yet taken a break but I've come close. There always seems to be ratties in need. Last time I was without rats was 2001. Wow.
 
lilspaz68 said:
Now is when you try to do the things you were unable to do with your ratters around...not sure what it would be for you, but I am sure you can think of something :D
Click to expand...

Gosh even I don't know what it'll be yet. I'm going to try and get back into painting and find some yoga classes. Or tai chi. Or both :shock:

Claireybell2477 said:
Awww, I know that pain. It's bloody horrible :( I took a break for an entire year last year. Empty cage syndrome is intense at first...

It's going to be natural for you to feel those instincts for a while. It sucks though! But the intensity will fade.
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Thanks, I was worried I was going into psychosis or something. I'm glad I'm not the only one but it sucks still. I'm sorry you had to go through that :(.

Godmother said:
I also feel lost after a sick one has died, especially when there were frequent medications and special food.
.
Click to expand...

That is definitely a part of it too. This morning I was about to grab the bus and almost panicked about not doing morning meds :/ There's this gap of time that used to be full of nursing activities and now it's not. It's odd.

jorats said:
I have not yet taken a break but I've come close. There always seems to be ratties in need. Last time I was without rats was 2001. Wow.
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I will certainly be adopting when I'm ready. I need time to acknowledge and think through my mistakes and get some funds tucked away for veterinary purposes, which I've yet to do all this time, before I start adopting/rescuing. I'd like to help with rescues more but for now I'm just going to lurk in the background and offer aid where I can until I get my crap together.
 
Godmother said:
It does get exhausting and expensive. Most people need a break sometimes. Do you have any friends with rats that you could visit?
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Unfortunately no :( but there's this forum I know about with all kinds of good stories and heaps of awesome pictures... :)

There's PetSmart just behind my work but I refuse to go in there, especially now that I have no feasible reason to other than looking at rats. If they have a Jaxx-repeat then I'll run right in but otherwise, nooope.
 
I'm sorry you are going through this too. It really isn't nice. It used to make me feel very uncomfortable. Hugs to you my friend. I do know what you're going through. But I promise, one day it will end. It won't be forever. So for now, let yourself heal and try to enjoy having some time to nurture yourself. You will get ratties again, and If I could get through the crappiness of what you're going through now - you can too :) xx
 
I can imagine it's hard to go through this. I've felt for the last few years that I need to take a break to heal. I've been loving and caring for rats since 2001 and have not had a break, but have had 47 rats cross over in this time, as well as mice and other pets like cats and dogs. But the frequent losses and illnesses associated with the little animals has been tough, and yes, can be exhausting emotionally, mentally, and physically. And vet care is expensive.

I currently have two boys whom I'm assuming are between 12 and 15 months old; they were adopted from a humane society when my last older boy ended up on his own when his two brothers passed unexpectedly within a few months of each other. I hadn't wanted Aleister to be alone. Then Aleister passed a mere three weeks after I brought these two boys home (Al and Lester, named after Aleister out of honor to him).

I am trying to bring myself to take a break for a while after these two little fellows cross over. And I have wondered about how difficult it is to get through those first few weeks or even first couple of months. It seems that enough rat people do take breaks though, for the same reasons stipulated; the heart needs to heal from their frequent illnesses and loss, and also the financial aspect of it too.

I hope that your heart can start to heal soon as the next few weeks pass. Perhaps you need to go get into those activities you mentioned, like painting and yoga, to allow your mind to focus on the new activities which will help put a filter between the 'old' and the 'new'. And as others have also said, you'll know when you're ready again. I know some people who've gone several or more years before they were ready. It really depends upon each person.

I think what worries me is getting down to one rat, and how that rat will fare. I have to assume that, because that last rat has spent most of its life with at least one other rat, and if you love them lots, they are okay with that. I, too, dread those first few weeks over being 'ratless' and seeing all their stuff around. I can understand your hesitation to take their CN down because then it might feel more 'empty', yet at the same time, seeing it there also prolongs the sense of missing them. I'd think that when you take the cage down and get into your new activities, you'll feel more of a sense of balance and strength to take the necessary hiatus.

I wish you all the best. I think that, in a few more weeks, you'll be much more used to the new situation enough to be able to go forward and cope. And you have folks here for support. I know that, if/when I do manage to take that hiatus after almost 15 years of rat care, I'll need to come here to chat about it initially too. We all understand.

This is your time to take care of you and heal; use it to nurture yourself. Your rats would want that for you.
 
I hate to say it but it never stops sucking. My last rats were timed with my moving to the Northwest Territories so that made it a bit easier as I didn't have to look at the empty cage. However I didn't survive being petless for more than 4 months (would have been less but I had to wait for my xmas break lol) so hopefully you have other fur babies to cuddle with. But even still over a year and a half later knowing I have an empty CN at my mom's house is killing me! Sadly it will still be a while for me until I find a place to settle down.
 
You know a good option may be fostering for a rescue. You could still have ratties, keep the rescue safe by making sure they are virus free and you can have rats in your life and not have to pay for vet care :)
 
I can't imagine as I have not been without many rats since Oct 2004 ....
but that day is coming soon because of my living situation
You have given me a lot to think about

good luck
 
It's not as painful, a few days later, but it still smarts a bit when I momentarily forget that no one is there. Like just now waking up early so I can game a bit before work, and I wanted to get the rats out on the couch. :/

I don't have any fur babies. It's weird because this is the very first time, ever, since I was about five years old, that there are absolutely no furry animals or companion animals in my home. I grew up with a dog and cats and now I'm living with my boyfriend and we have none. He has reptiles but the beardy is in burmation and the geckos... well they just don't know how to cuddle. I don't think the fish would appreciate me trying either.

The fostering is a great idea. Unfortunately I don't have a car and my local OSPCA doesn't appear to have ratties at the moment, but if anyone is in the Barrie area I'm open to it!

And thanks everyone. I didn't realize it's normal to still have these moments. Your support means a lot.
 

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